OK...the Newfie jokes are in. Newfoundland joined Canada in 1949 and there was actually a point in time when they were given the opportunity to join the US. But the US declined the idea. Another tid-bit: Newfoundland is a 1/2 hour ahead of people in the Atlantic time zone. 12:00 in Charlottetown, 12:30 in St. John's.

The Newfie joke is a very unique form of joke, usually in two forms. The first is the Newfie outwitting the mainlander:

What's black and blue and floats in the bay?
A mainlander telling a Newfie joke

or:

Newfie Waiter: Would you like to try the beef tongue?
Mainlander: No, I do not eat anything that comes from an animal's mouth.
Newfie Waiter: Would you like an omelette instead?

The second form is making fun of a Newfie, such as:

A Newfie is going icefishing. He starts to drill a hole with his auger when a loud booming voice says "THERE'S NO FISH DOWN THERE!" So he stops drilling and moves a little ways and starts to drill again. The same voice booms "THERE'S NO FISH DOWN THERE!". So he moves a little further and is about to drill again, but the voice
immediately comes again "THERE"S NO FISH THERE EITHER!". The Newf looks around and says "Who are you anyways? God?"

"NO I'M THE ARENA MANAGER!"


"Roll Up the Rim!" (Roll up the Rim was a contest at Tim Hortons...a Canadian donut/coffee shop - which is far better than Duncan Donuts)

A Newfie goes into a coffee shop and notices there's a "peel and win" sticker on her coffee cup. So she peels it off and starts screaming,"I've won a motor home! I've won a motor home!"

The waitress says, "That's impossible. The biggest prize is a free Lunch."

But the Newfie keeps on screaming, "I've won a motor home! I've won a motor home!"

Finally, the manager comes over and says, "Ma'am, I'm sorry, but you're mistaken. You couldn't have possibly won a motor home because we didn't have that as a prize!"

The Newfie says, "No, it's not a mistake. I've won a motor home!"

She hands the ticket to the manager and HE reads... "W I N A B A G E L"

Hunting with a Newfie
An Irishman, an Englishman, and a Newfie had decided to go on a hunting trip and were staying in a cabin in the woods. They decided to go hunting one at a time, while the other two stayed and guarded the cabin. The Irishman goes out first and comes back with a fox. He says, very simply, "I see tracks, I follow tracks, I catch fox.". Then the Englishman goes out and comes back with a rabbit. He says, "I see tracks, I follow tracks, I catch rabbit.". Then it was the Newfie's turn. He goes out and comes back limping and badly beaten up. He says, "I see tracks, I follow tracks, I get hit by train."